I just finished polishing my nails with a polish full of sparkles & tiny pink hearts. I adore bunnies, flowers, hearts, shiny things, children’s stories & music & pink. I can be low on cash & still buy an orchid because it makes me smile. Even though it doesn’t translate to my blog, I type my posts in comic sans because it’s fun & makes me happy. I’m just that way: hopelessly happy, sunny & optimistic. My husband calls me frivolous. Maybe I am. I have a lot of fun & little fear.
Remember that girl/guy who everybody thought was a little strange? The one who wore crazy stuff, always seemed happy no matter what & would randomly do things like give flowers to strangers on the street & smile at grumpy people for no reason other than because it might make the grumpy person smile? I’m that girl. That is my tribe: the Tribe of the Fun & Frivolous. I would like to extend an official invitation to you to join me in Tribe membership. Some of us are born into this tribe (henceforth referred to as the Tribe) while others make their way here later. Why would you want to be a memeber of the Tribe? After all, we’re fun but we’re FRIVOLOUS & frivolous means unnecessary & probably useless. Nobody likes being called frivolous! Or do they?
In the spirit of reclaiming-all-that’s-negative, I will answer with a resounding “YES!” to the above question. Being called frivolous is usually done by those who are stone set on having as little pleasure in their lives as they can manage. Some of these “no-fun-allowed-ers” could wipe the smile off a daisy with their dourness & insistance on struggle. For them, pleasure is a dirty word. They’ve convinced entire civilizations of this skewed view & built whole “religions” around them. Most of the world buys into this way of seeing; most of the world has a serious pleasure/fun deficit. We are indoctrinated from first kick in the womb that pleasure is only allowed as a reward for the long slog of our days, preferrably a whole lot of days with only a teeny tiny bit of something pleasurable allowed as reward. Half a cheap chocolate bar for two months’ worth of study, writing, lecturing & correcting awful papers by disinterested students is a rather generous offer from these folks. No wonder people are eating themselves to death & keeling over from any number of stress related diseases. And sex??? Forget it! The no-fun-allowed-ers have hacked into sex with gusto & spoiled that, too. After all, sex is one of life’s greatest pleasures. We certainly can’t have people going around thinking it’s okay to enjoy as much sex as they want. What would the world come to with a bunch of well-sexed people running about? Is it any wonder that doing something so deeply pleasurable as going after our dreams is met with so much internal resistance?
The Tribe. What good is it to have membership in the Tribe of the Fun & Frivolous? Isn’t being frivolous kind of bad & well, frivolous? Don’t the no-funners have a point? Yes & their point is based on fear, not something very helpful to living life in the key of awesome as I imagine you’re wanting or you’d be reading elsewhere. Fear will block all efforts at practicing The Fine Art. Every. Single. Time. Without The Fine Art there is no courage to follow your bliss, most likely because your bliss will be waaaaaay over there where you can barely see it, let alone follow it. And if you decide to go chasing it…. Well, everybody knows what happens when you chase something. Best to learn from the Tribe how to seduce that little beauty into coming over & getting cozy with you of its own accord. Enter the value of being frivolous.
When you engage in something for the sheer fun of it, when you gift of yourself for your own pleasure it only seems frivolous (a.k.a. pointless) because that is what we’re taught. It’s that anti-pleasure thing run amok again. Remember the “What-will-people-thinks” & the “I-could-nevers”? They are the status quo (a.k.a. No-funners) peace keepers. If everybody’s running about whining “Omigosh ain’t it awful!” & slaving away, they can’t be having any fun getting tuned in, turned on & juiced up. They aren’t sassy, they’re easily controlled. Just dole out a tiny bit of low grade pleasure-stuffs & BLAMMO! Everybody stays relatively quiet & accepting of whatever the No-funners tell them. The No-funners don’t have to face their fears & that keeps them comfortable. Problem is everybody who buys into this way of being is starving. Their souls are starved. Their creatvity is starved. Their juice has dried up & they look years older than they are chronologically. UGH! I get the shivers just thinking about all that dry starvation. Worse than sitting through a horror movie in the dark in an old house by myself. Or worse: a chick flick! ::shiver, shiver::
What can you do to stave off the dessication prescribed by the no-funners? How do you gain membership into the Tribe? Thankfully it’s simple & heaps of fun. Remember that silly thing you said “Nah! I don’t have time for that!” to? That thing you said you’d get to after retirement/housework/landing your next big client? Yeah, that thing. Do that. Then find something else silly. If you feel guilty about it you’re probably onto something fun. Wear stilettos & slinky lingerie to wash the dishes. Buy a package of jacks & play a game. Go play on the swings in the park at midnight. Hopefully it’ll be raining for extra fun. Buy those dang Cookie Monster underwear & wear ’em to work under your well tailored, high powered business suit, guys.
Keep this up long enough & you’ll notice a wonderful change creeping up on you. You’ll feel lighter of spirit, less easily ruffled, you’ll smile more for no particular reason. You’ll start to take on a juicier look & attitude. And your dreams will begin to inch closer in an effort to find out what all the fun is about. When they do, keep right on engaging in frivolity & fun. Your dreams will jump in & play right along with you. Now get thee forth & be frivolous! We of the Tribe are waiting eagerly for your arrival & promise to throw a huge celebration in your honor when you arrive.