#1: I exist. Therefore I am worthy. Therefore I deserve to have my desires fulfilled.
Pipette is very good at this. She never questions whether she is worthy of something she wants. She wants it & that’s that. No issues about asking for what she wants, either. No guilt. And she doesn’t easily accept “no” if she really, really, REALLY wants something. My other dogs may go lay down, sulk & wish if I say no, but not Pipette. If she wants it, she’ll find a way to get it.
#2: Being adorable gets you a whole lot of really good stuff!
Sure, it’s great to focus on what you want & go for it. However there are many ways to “go for it”, some easier than others. Being adorable can open doors when you didn’t think there were any doors at all. It can get you amazing loot, too! People respond to sweetness. Dogs respond to sweetness. Remember that old saying of your grandma’s that used to annoy you? “You catch more flies with honey than vinegar”? It’s true. Being adorble is a lot less stressful than the current tactic in vogue of being snarky & rude, a.k.a. “keeping it real”. You ever notice how real is code for nasty & an excuse for being mean? Nobody ever seems to be keeping it real if it’s wonderful, pleasant or fun. Trust me, adorable gets you much more of what you want than bitching, whining or sniping ever will.
#3: Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself.
Pipette weighs somewhere around 9 or 10 lbs. She’s literally the smallest mammal in the house. If it wasn’t for Ibi the Amazon, she’d be the smallest being in the house. The cat is bigger than Pipette. In Pipette’s mind she’s Grande Dame of the household. She has no problem getting in anybody’s face if they rub her the wrong way. When we’re out & about in town she carries the same air. If you’re rude she WILL tell you off & be quick about it if you’re a dog; if you’re a human, she’ll walk away from you & refuse to interact. Either way, she’s perfectly willing to & capable of protecting her space & dignity when necessary.
#4: If you like something, show your appreciation heartily.
It’s easy to fall into the habit of not saying thank you or even acknowledging when someone does something or gives us something we really like. We don’t want to seem “gushy”. Why? If you seem like you couldn’t care less then what’s the incentive for someone to do something for or give you anything ever again? Where’s the pleasure in doing something for someone who only notices when we’re doing something they don’t like? Pipette is always enthusiastic about things I do for her that make her happy. Car ride? Woohoo! Toy time? YAY!!! Snuggle time? Mmmmm! If someone does something you like or gives you something you really enjoy then say so & with the enthusiasm equal to the amount of your pleasure! And none of that ridiculous “sandwiching” technique of nice-complaint-nice. Save your complaints for another time, not when you just got that bracelet you’ve been aching for as a total surprise. Keep that up & all you’ll end up with is a sandwich you make yourself.
#5: If you don’t like something, graciously decline the offer.
Another offer to go out with people you aren’t particularly fond of? No need to screw up your face & act like there’s poop on their clothes nor cave in & have a miserable time. Smile & graciously make judicious use of the word “no”. Someone insists you eat caviar & you utterly detest it? No problem. Firmly but politely decline their offer. You could even suggest something you’d like better. No need to bitch slap them nor accept something you’d rather not. No isn’t a dirty word, but neither is it necessary to be nasty – most of the time (see lesson #3). Pipette doesn’t much care for quail at the moment. She doesn’t make a fuss, she simply won’t eat it unless it’s mixed in with other stuff or she’s really hungry. I may think it’s a special treat, but she doesn’t. We don’t fight about it & she doesn’t try ot take my hand off because I had the gall to serve her quail for supper. She simply sniffs it, sits politely by her dish, looks at me & wags her tail fully expecting me to remove the offending birdy bits & replace it with something more to her liking. (FYI, these are the nights she goes hungry. I don’t cater to picky eaters. Remove even the possibility of treats between meals & she finds quail very tasty the next day.)
#6: Know when you need help & don’t be afraid to ask for or accept it.
Pipette, like my other dogs, eats a raw diet. Occasionally she gets a bone stuck in her teeth. Mighty uncomfortable. She doesn’t hesitate to accept my help. I have opposable thumbs very useful for removing stuck things. Likewise, going outside to potty is quite uncomfortable in winter. Coats are lovely things to have, but she can’t get them on herself & she won’t go outside in the cold without one. I help her get into & out of her coat & even put sweaters on when she’s cold in the house. I give out the food & treats, too. All things she can’t do herself. Can you imagine how things would go if she was like many of us & refused help “on principle”? Dinner would be a rare & unhappy occurrence; no treats, no toys, no warm clothing, no gifts, no FUN!!! It’s a pleasure to allow others to help when we need it & sometimes just because they can. It makes life far easier & more pleasurable. I really need to remember this one. I can be a real do-it-myself kinda girl. Things are a lot easier when I allow other people the pleasure of helping me.